but mostly, the idea of camping freaks me out because i am deathly afraid of the woods. & apparently i'm not the only one! the forest has been a subject wrought with mystery for all of recorded history. it is land dense with vegetation, naturally designed with plenty of places to hide. you will be hard-pressed to find two people who agree on the symbolic implications of the woods, but there is definitely an aura of spirituality attached (another thing i've never been very comfortable with). in Alabama, where i'm from, the woods are commonly referred to as "God's Country;" however, while Thoreau went into the woods to find himself, Nathaniel Hawthorne sent his Young Goodman Brown into the woods to lose his soul. perhaps the mystery within the forest lies in the fact that it is ungovernable territory. there can be no law in nature; riotous chaos flourishes amongst the trees that shadow our earth.
when i was about 8 years old, i decided to go exploring in the woods beside my family's house. & well, it wasn't REALLY what you would call a "forest," just a section of trees separating my neighborhood from the adjacent apartment complex, but it was as close to the great outdoors as you could get in Vestavia Hills. anyway, i set out on my journey at around 3 in the afternoon & must have just lost track of time, because before i knew it the sun was setting! i had probably ventured a little over a mile into the trees & i was completely lost- everything looked the same, no landmarks, no people. as a child, i was fearless & being stuck in the woods for a few hours didn't scare me at all; however, after a long while of walking around, i heard people calling my name. apparently my parents freaked out when i didn't come home after an hour or so & sent a search party (made up of our neighbors & my father's assistant) to find me. when i got home, i was harshly reprimanded for scaring the crap out of everyone & warned to never step foot into the woods again. they didn't have to tell me twice! after being in the woods for what seemed like an eternity, i was more than willing to forego any further relations with Mother Nature.
i didn't have a spiritual experience through my encounter in the woods that day, more an unbridled curiosity about the power that lies within the growth, the place that lends me breath & shade & room to run. i feel connected to the woods, as i'm sure is a distinctly human condition. & although i probably will not be seen rustlin' up some grub at the camp site, or whatever it is you do when you're out there, i feel quite sure of the fact that my respect for that space will not diminish...
& who knows! i did buy myself a hammock the other day! anything's possible.
love.sb
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